Archive for the ‘funny’ Category
wedding quotes
a nice one
“a successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”
Germaine Greer
a funny one
“you will love being married. it’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life”
Rita Rudner
oaktree or squash?
When James Garfield (later President of the U.S.) was principal of Hiram College in Ohio, a father asked him if the course of study could be simplified so that his son might be able to go through by a shorter route. “Certainly,” Garfield replied. “But it all depends on what you want to make of your boy. When God wants to make an oak tree, He takes a hundred years. When He wants to make a squash he requires only two months.”
We are producing too many squashes and not enough oak trees in our day.
Angus J. MacQueen.
the best email joke in Australia in 2001
This was voted as the best e-mail joke in Australia in 2001.
After being nearly snowbound for two weeks last winter, a Seattle man departed for his vacation in Miami Beach, where he was to meet his wife the next day at
the conclusion of her business trip to Minneapolis.
They were looking forward to pleasant weather and a nice time together. Unfortunately, there was some sort of mix up at the boarding gate, and the man
was told he would have to wait for a later flight.
He tried to appeal to a supervisor but was told the airline was not responsible
for the problem and It would do no good to complain.
Upon arrival at the hotel the next day, he discovered that Miami Beach was having a heat wave, and its weather was almost as uncomfortably hot as Seattle’s was cold. The desk clerk gave him a message that his wife would arrive as planned. He could hardly wait to get to the pool area to cool off, and quickly sent his wife an e-mail, but due to his haste, he made an error in the e-mail address. His message therefore arrived at the home of an elderly preacher’s wife whose even older husband had died only the day before.
When the grieving widow opened her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor,
let out an anguished scream, and fell to the floor dead. Her family rushed to
her room where they saw this message on the screen.
Dearest wife, Departed yesterday as you know. Just now got checked in. Some confusion at the gate. Appeal was denied. Received confirmation of your arrival
tomorrow. Your loving husband.
P.S. Things are not as we thought. You’re going to be surprised at how hot it
is down here.
sometimes Christians just don’t believe in prayers
A story about a liquor store/a pub built next to a church. Christians told the owner that they were going to pray that God would intervene and take care of the problem–and wipe them out.
The next night,a great thunderstorm came and lightning stroke the pub and the place burned down. The owner took the Christians to court; saying that it was their prayers that caused the lightning.
What did the Christian do? They hired attorney, and they said “We are not responsible for this pub burning down.”
The judge said: “I don’t know which way it’s gonna go, but one thing seems clear: the bar owner believe in prayers and the Christians don’t.”
From: Running To Win - The Discipline Of Prayer #1 of 3
